Sunday, March 28, 2010
Well...
A resolution has been reached in regards to Mommy time. We will see if it holds up to real world testing. Meanwhile, the kids are at grandma's for the morning and Daddy's off to work soon.
Saturday, March 27, 2010
Stressed
I got up at quarter after 7, hoping to steal some time to myself. Sounds like the girls are already waking up so this will be short.
I wish I could tell you I've done some more knitting since the last time I posted, but time for those pursuits has been sparse and it shows in my stress levels. I have had maybe two hours combined of time for myself this week - to knit or work on a project, something not work, chores or baby-chasing.
OK,I'm going to catch myself before I walk the fine line between explaining a problem and gratuitous bitching. The problem now is that I feel guilty because I'm not home with the kids during the day and he takes full advantage of that and gets on the computer pretty much the second I walk in the door and stays there all night. This leaves me handling the kids by myself. Even having helping hands over, it's still just enough so I can go get a shower or make dinner - I still have to nurse babies, organize the baths and pj's, and get them to sleep. I feel like I should give him time away from the kids - after all, I've been away all day. But then I also feel like I've got a lot more to do - making meals, housework that gets overlooked, dishes, putting out the trash. And the kicker is he's been out of work this week and I feel like I've worked harder at home with him here than I do when he's working.
I am so tired of this. I am tired of not being able to talk about it without starting a fight. I'm tired of being taken for granted and having my needs ignored. Babies are up. Gotta go. Because, of course, he won't get up and take care of them so I can have some goddamn time to myself.
I miss knitting.
I wish I could tell you I've done some more knitting since the last time I posted, but time for those pursuits has been sparse and it shows in my stress levels. I have had maybe two hours combined of time for myself this week - to knit or work on a project, something not work, chores or baby-chasing.
OK,I'm going to catch myself before I walk the fine line between explaining a problem and gratuitous bitching. The problem now is that I feel guilty because I'm not home with the kids during the day and he takes full advantage of that and gets on the computer pretty much the second I walk in the door and stays there all night. This leaves me handling the kids by myself. Even having helping hands over, it's still just enough so I can go get a shower or make dinner - I still have to nurse babies, organize the baths and pj's, and get them to sleep. I feel like I should give him time away from the kids - after all, I've been away all day. But then I also feel like I've got a lot more to do - making meals, housework that gets overlooked, dishes, putting out the trash. And the kicker is he's been out of work this week and I feel like I've worked harder at home with him here than I do when he's working.
I am so tired of this. I am tired of not being able to talk about it without starting a fight. I'm tired of being taken for granted and having my needs ignored. Babies are up. Gotta go. Because, of course, he won't get up and take care of them so I can have some goddamn time to myself.
I miss knitting.
Monday, March 8, 2010
Quickie
I will post more later on when I have a bit more time - even some pictures!
OK, so I lost my voice this weekend and Jon's parents were kind enough to take all 3 kids Saturday night and let me rest Sunday. I had to go into work for a bit, but I ended up with a sizable afternoon to myself for the first time in forever. I missed my babies, but it was incredibly relaxing. I picked up around the house, worked on some paper-craftiness I'd wanted to start, and I knit. Oh, how I knit.
So this sock is almost complete. I finished the swoopy heel (not as hard as it looks, but definitely fun!) and most of the leg - only the ribbing left and it's one sock done! The evil little monkey in me wants to size it down to kid -size and make Andy a pair. The pragmatist in me says finish a pair first, then finish some other projects - then we'll see about these crazy new projects. The inner battles never cease for a knitter.
Off to work and the doctor today. If I get some time later, I promise pictures. Maybe even another post or two. And, even though I know this is my knitting journal - I really want to show you some of the paper stuff I've been working on.
Have Fun!
OK, so I lost my voice this weekend and Jon's parents were kind enough to take all 3 kids Saturday night and let me rest Sunday. I had to go into work for a bit, but I ended up with a sizable afternoon to myself for the first time in forever. I missed my babies, but it was incredibly relaxing. I picked up around the house, worked on some paper-craftiness I'd wanted to start, and I knit. Oh, how I knit.
So this sock is almost complete. I finished the swoopy heel (not as hard as it looks, but definitely fun!) and most of the leg - only the ribbing left and it's one sock done! The evil little monkey in me wants to size it down to kid -size and make Andy a pair. The pragmatist in me says finish a pair first, then finish some other projects - then we'll see about these crazy new projects. The inner battles never cease for a knitter.
Off to work and the doctor today. If I get some time later, I promise pictures. Maybe even another post or two. And, even though I know this is my knitting journal - I really want to show you some of the paper stuff I've been working on.
Have Fun!
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